Sunday, September 03, 2006


"bless our stories that they may somehow be true, for this is all we have....
bless the empty spaces that are within our bodies, the vast distances inside each cell. bless each cell, which is its own universe, ready to divide, split in two and make more than enough" stuart kestenbaum

i read somewhere that people created religion so that they could feel better about the fact that they would die, a finite ending to their reality. so, an afterlife story makes death less scary. And I guess the next step was that living a "good" life would allow for a good afterlife and so on and so forth until we get religions dictating the "right" way to live and even the "right" god to believe in.

so, it was slightly depressing to consider that my beliefs were just my imagined story or something i adopted that was dictated to control the population. i keep thinking of the radio spot on national public radio called "for this i believe", saying the title to myself, trying to find a core knowing that resonates clearly. today, i believe "for every action there is an opposite and equal reaction." i think it is scientific proof of the golden rule.
i have been meditating on an article i read by pema chondra for a week now. in it she says that war begins in our hearts. she said that if we all dealt with (softening, healing) the rigid, hardened, contracted places in our own hearts that there would not be war. immediately i realized i needed to deal with a relationship in which a person offended me greatly and thus i decided, in a sense, she was dead to me.

then a wasp stung me on my chest, smack dab center!! really!!
nature giving me and electric jolt to re-activate that deadened place in my heart.
i have been walking around for a week feeling like the sacred heart jesus icon statue. (the one with his heart exposed and enflamed.) i really believe that is why the wasp stung my chest?
yes, for this i believe.

i have been reading a book called the left hand of god. in it the author says that often people vote for candidates or parties that tout strong religious leanings to the right, even if they don't agree fully. the author's research showed that people just wanted to believe in something and the left hasn't provided that. i also heard dr cornell west say on the tavis smiley radio show that people who believe (in something anything) live a longer life.

....well here's to figuring out what we all personally believe!

p.s. i have shifted to mainly doing collage angels of late as we are gearing up for a premiere and rehearsing in every spare moment! now i'm gluing and cutting is my morning meditation on benevolence and enough time.
...maybe next time i'll post photos of my favorite collage....a group of construction workers stretching before their workday begins now winged beings alighting right in front of the port o potties!
check out the details of our new show "warped like space and time" on our site schedule. and our collaborators

the angels pictured are awards for the moving in the spirit 20th anniversary. check out the organization at:


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